the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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