Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
another moral hangover. fuck.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
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