Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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