arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
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