how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize