You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
