when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
It's Friday. Sex?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
