we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
