Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize