tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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