like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize