Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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