Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
