I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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