he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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