How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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