what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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