So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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