All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
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