He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
There's even glitter on my cock...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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