South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize