You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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