it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Randomize
