Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
