Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
i think my cat just said my name.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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