quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
