Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize