i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
