HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
