that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
