I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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