Your face is a jimmy john
she was so not down for the gang bang
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize