Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
