there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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