well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Sext me about skeletons
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
