Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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