Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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