I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
