I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
