i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
be right there i have to get my cape
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
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