I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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