1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
