he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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