Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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