I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
