I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
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