put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
