I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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