its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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