He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize