so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
